Obsessive Compulsive: Calvin Pees

This Site Is Dead! Last updated some time in 2002. Here for archival purposes. This is where the action is.

There’s nothing quintessentially more American than t-shirts, bumper stickers, and bad taste. Well that, and copyright infringement. The current exploitation of Calvin from “Calvin and Hobbes” is enough to kill the creator and make him roll over in his grave. Americans love thier cars, and Americans love to put ugly art on their cars, but nothing says “I’m an idiot with a pointless opinion” like a window sticker of Calvin peeing on something.

Bill Watterson quit producing the comic strip “Calvin and Hobbes” at the height of it’s popularity. He was somewhat of a recluse when it came publicity and mass marketing. As a result, every Calvin and Hobbes t-shirt that you’ve ever seen has been a bootleg. The characters of Calvin and Hobbes have been co-opted by by popular culture to a degree that surpasses any other phenomenon, with the possible exception of the smiley face. Only time will tell if Watterson’s characters have as long of a shelf life as the smiley face. Calvin and Hobbes have been transformed from wholesome, Dennis-the-Menace type characters (with a better imagination) to frat boys drinking beer, smoking pot and most recently, peeing on every known auto manufacturer logo.

Apparently, it's not enough to like the car that you drive, you’ve also got to hate other brands of cars. I’ve been collecting pictures of these auto-window stickers for a couple of years now with mixed results. It’s hard to remember to constantly bring a camera with you, and even harder to drive and take a picture at the same time. There are some that I’ve missed, and some that I’ve only gotten bad photos of. Some people have no problem with wanting everyone to know that they don’t like Fords, but they get really bent out of shape when you try and take a picture.

Where do they come from? I’ve never seen one in an auto parts store, although I’ve only looked a couple of times. As far as I can tell, the biggest source seems to be guys at carnivals with a computer and vinyl cutter. They set up shop with about a hundred tacky decals of witty sayings like “Shit Happens” and ripped off cartoon characters. By far the most popular variation is Calvin peeing on something. And talk about camera shy, these guys get very defensive if you try to take pictures. Ironically, a lot of their concerns are similar in nature to copyright infringement. It seems that they don’t want anyone getting a picture of the designs and then producing them themselves. One guy even had the nerve to insist that I couldn’t take any pictures since I didn’t ask him first. I reminded him that he was in an open-air carnival on public property, so he might as well shut up and say cheese. Snap! Snap!

Next Page: Variations and Christians

Who is Kilwag? Contact Kilwag.